You are enough. You are enough now. You will be enough tomorrow. You were enough yesterday. Read that again. You are enough. I approach parenting with a sense of humor to allow myself the grace needed to make mistakes. But it is not lost on me how hard this gig really is. Our own insecurities can feed into self-doubt in the hardest of moments. I am here to tell you, you are enough.
I have a great relationship with my children. And yet, there are days where I doubt my ability to be the mom they need. There are challenges I never anticipated I would face. When I feel my self-doubt, insecurities, or anger starting to build, I have found solace in stepping away. For me, this is usually outside.
I have sat on my front porch to listen to a baby cry it out in an attempt to self sooth. I have walked a baby in a stroller to clear both of our minds and our hearts. I have sat at a park to let a toddler run off energy I just didn’t have the capacity to keep up with. I have sat at the end of my driveway to pray and ask God’s advice on how to handle the challenges that come from divorce and blended families.
When I allow myself to escape social media (the answers on not there). When I allow myself time away from the situation. When I give myself a few moments outside I can find my strength. I can find clarity. I can find enough of myself to remember I am the person chosen to take care of these two wonderful humans. They were given to me because nobody else in this world could do it better.
When I have a clear mind, alone. I have tried the glass of wine (the answer is not there). I find the clear mind leads to a clear heart. I am able to fill myself with the good memories of the day. I am able to fill myself with thoughts of the things I did well. The clear mind and the fresh air come together in a way I can so easily see the answers of what I need to do next.
I have been told that our ability to grow depends on ability to look at our own flaws and face them head on. Often the build of tired hungry kids going through their own growth can be enough to expose our flaws as adults. I try to remember that while I am the adult I am still growing. Our whole family is growing together.
I know every parent goes through these moments. I find that nature allows me to close my eyes, breathe deep, and then shows me the hidden path forward I couldn’t see when I was caught up in my flaws. Whether it is on your own or with the little ones take a moment to get out of your head. Get outside. Close your eyes. Breathe. Go back and hug those babies and start fresh. You were the one chosen to be exactly what they need.
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